My Week as a "Mom"

This last week I had the opportunity to have my 4 month old nephew stay with us for the week. He lives 5 hours away, so we don't see him much. Naturally, I was thrilled at the chance to keep him for a week. "This will be so much fun!" Well, it was fun to some extent. However, it was more of an eye-opening experience.

It all started with what is usually a 4 1/2 hour non-stop ride for Mr. B and I to a 5 hour plus one stop ride with an on/off fussy baby. Having to listen to the poor baby cry for 30 miles was a bit difficult. When there's no place to pull over, you just have to deal. Next, I come home and I'm used to unloading the car and getting straight to unpacking so I can veg out in front of the TV or catch up on some reading. Nope! I've got to get the baby out of the car and change him and make sure I get him settled before I start unpacking. I didn't get unpacked until after  midnight that night, and we got home at 7. Of course, sweet baby was very fussy that night. "OK, I can do this!" became my mantra all week. Mr. B was so sweet and helpful throughout everything. Luckily for us, Jude (my nephew) slept through the night.

 Day 2 was a bit easier. I went to hang out with my friend from work, who is still kind of a new mom. We were going to have some pool time. We did this a couple of summers ago. This time, it was a drastically different experience. There was no lounging in the sun to work on our tans. There was no simple floating with easy conversation in the pool. It was more of a "is the baby getting too hot? Should we put more sunscreen on? Do you think they're allergic to this sunscreen? He/she is hungry. They want out." Not the most relaxing experience. But hey, at least we got to cool off a bit.

Day 3 wasn't too bad either. We went to story time at the library. Jude slept through the night again, so I wasn't overly exhausted. He would even take a nice long nap with me in the afternoons. I was getting some of my usual stuff done while he was asleep or playing. Mr. B was still tag-teaming with me when he was able. I was on my own while he was at work. That night, things took a bit of a turn.

Day 4 and Jude decides he wants to wake up at 4 to eat. Ok, Mr. B, you change the diaper and I'll make the bottle. Done. Thankfully, Jude goes back to sleep until 8 the next morning immediately after his bottle. I had plans to spend time with friends that day and was taking Jude with me. His parents had come to stay the night and I was busily trying to usher them out the door so I could leave. I also had to get myself together and make sure Jude was ready to go with all things I may/may not need throughout the day. He slept the whole hour-long drive. He did alright for the first few hours. He even let me enjoy a nice lunch out with the girls. When we got back, it was a different story. He was extremely fussy. It made getting things done very difficult. I constantly had to stop what I was doing (something I do not like to do when I'm very involved in something) to try to get him to calm down. He just wouldn't sleep. He did eventually crash on the drive back home. It was a bit of a challenge to get him to sleep that night, but it was done. Until 4am.....

Day 5 he was up again, but went to sleep until 8:30 after his bottle. It was a good day. Mr. B was off, so I had some help. We ran a few errands, and he did great. He even took a really long nap that afternoon. His parents came back that night. Jude went to sleep fairly easily. Again, he was up early. A little before 4 this time.

Day 6 he did not go back to sleep until after 5 am. We stayed at home most of the day. He went to story time with his parents that morning. He wasn't too thrilled about his early afternoon nap, but he eventually went down. He had a difficult night. This last night he stayed with his parents. Of course, he slept mostly through the night and didn't require a bottle at 4 am. He was even good at church the next morning.

Throughout this experience, I would ask Mr. B: "Are you sure you're ready for this?" He would always respond, "Yes, I know I can do this. It won't be easy, but we can do it." Several times throughout the week I would have to stop and ask myself, "Am I really ready for this? Can I really stop being so selfish with my time?" I mean, I really had to stop and think. I usually have 10 books read by now. I haven't even finished one book. I've usually watched several shows on Netflix....can't even get one started. I haven't started any of my home projects. Mr. B and I have always wanted children. We can close a couple of years ago to having not one, but two children! Looking back, I honestly don't know how I would've handled that. I guess I would like to think that while I have the personality type that thrives on routine and structure, I also thrive under pressure. I'm a problem solver. I get things done that need to be done. I've always been that way. So am I ready for a baby to be in my life on a permanent basis? Yeah, I really think so. It'll mean a lot of life changes and personal changes on my part, but the rewards will far outweigh what I'm having to "give up." I really feel Mr. B and I have finally reached that point in our marriage where we can withstand the challenges of a new addition. Thursday, one of my friends said you really have to have a strong marriage to have children. I agree. I don't know if we will ever be blessed with children. I'd like to think children are in our future at some point. All we can do is continue to pray and have faith in God. While we wait, we can continue to grow together to form that stronger bond that will make us even better parents to a little one some day.